The Divine Appointment

This past week I began to feel this urgency to address some things in our marriage that have been affected as a result of the sexual abuse that I suffered. (By the way, if you think for a moment that past sexual abuse won’t affect a future marriage, you are very wrong! It will!) So the other night, Wednesday, I believe, Luke and I began to pray about it.

We confessed sin and prayed for healing. Healing in my body, mind and soul. Healing in our marriage and also for God to be the overcomer in my upcoming birth. I have been dealing with anxiety concerning giving birth again, partly because my body didn’t care too much for it last time (ha, whose does), and the fact that it has felt as if my body has been resisting and fighting against this pregnancy in every way possible. Something we feel is directly linked to the abuse. Anyhow, I digress. 

The following morning I woke up at 4:30 am freaking out about what I’m going to do with my hair during birth and after and I could not go back to sleep. Later on that morning, Luke and I were talking on the phone and I was telling him about the fact I felt like I really should get my hair braided so that it would be in a protective style for birth and make it easier for after the baby comes. He agreed and I called to set up an appointment. The lady seemed a bit hesitant that she could get me in in the next couple days, but she called me back later and said she could get me in at 7am the next morning. Since Luke would be home, and I couldn’t seem to sleep past 4:30-5 anyway, I took the appointment. 

The next morning I arrived at the braiding shop before she did, so I was waiting outside when she arrived. The moment she stepped out of her vehicle, I could hear her bible app blasting scripture. I was like, “This is cool! She’s a believer!” Little did I know that this woman was about to impact my life in an extreme way. 

As Mavis began to braid my hair, (the book of John playing in the background) we began to chat about things like where she’s from, pregnancy, birth and children. I then said something about how this pregnancy has been really tough, and I mentioned the chronic depression and she asked the question that would change the course of our conversation. “Why?” The next thing I know, I began to tell her about the abuse, coming forward, the depression and anxiety that followed and more. And she began to speak truth into me. 

Let me pause and tell you a tiny bit about Mavis. She is this tall, slender, beautiful African lady from Ghana, who has this grace, strength and dignity about her. There’s also this feeling of safety that exudes from her. One of those people who can’t be a stranger. 

So, as we’re talking and I’m telling my story she begins to poke at and expose the work of the enemy. She began to tell me her story and how she had learned just how real the principalities and powers of darkness are, and how they are/have been working and at play in my journey. 

1. THE SEXUAL ABUSE IS A RESULT OF A DEMONIC WORKING IN THE ABUSER.

As I would tell her different things, she would make comments on how what had happened to me was demonic, or how my abuser was/is working in witchcraft. When she used that word, I was a bit like, “Yeah, you’re from Africa, so witchcraft means something different to you.” But as I was telling this to Luke, I began to see just how right she is. Isn’t witchcraft made up of manipulating the powers of satan to achieve the results you want? Is that not what abuse is? Manipulating a person to do or allow you to do something to them that is evil? I could say more, but I’ll save that for later. 

2. DURING ABUSE, THERE IS A TRANSFER OF THAT POWER THAT BINDS THE VICTIM. SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED TO THE ABUSER. 

She was spot on about this. My abuser was abused and I feel that that has been a big factor in him becoming an abuser himself. Not that it gives him any kind of pass. In fact in no way does it. He still has the gift of choice. But, she went on to talk about how important it is for an abuse victim to break that power and bondage that has been transferred so that they don’t become an abuser themselves. 

3. FORGIVENESS IS THE ONLY WAY TO BREAK THE POWER AND HOLD THE ENEMY HAS. 

How does freedom from that bondage happen? Through forgiveness. I asked her what her theory on forgiveness was, and she said, “It is the choice to let go of that person. To let them out of the prison you attempted to put them in. I often say ‘I choose to choose to forgive.’” Letting that person go, releases you from the prison you’ve been put into. 

4. INTERCESSORY PRAYER IS THE BEST WAY TO FIGHT FOR JUSTICE. 

I told her how I (and my supporters) have gone to my abuser's church leaders over and over with little to no results and how I had tried to to go to the police but again, nothing. She got excited about this. She began to tell me how God didn’t want me to fight in court, with words or delegates, but that he wanted me to shut up and fight on my knees. That it is on my knees that I am able to release the power He needs to bring justice and vengeance. That justice and vengeance is His and His alone. That yes, there are times and places for fighting via words, delegates and court, but that it is useless unless we first fight on our knees. 

5. IT IS OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO STAND IN THE GAP IN PRAYER FOR THOSE WHO CANNOT FIGHT FOR THEMSELVES.

I also told her about the people who are directly affected, closely connected to, and in danger of being hurt by my abuser. Her response was one I hadn’t thought about before. She first began to say that she feels like what happened to me/us, was because there wasn’t anyone interceding and standing in the gap for us. She also went on to say how important it is for me to do so. To stand in the gap for those who are under the influence of this man's “witchcraft” and can’t see the truth.She also said that these people who are close to him and under his influence will also be held accountable if someone else gets hurt. How much more of a reason to intercede on their behalf? 

There was a lot more we talked about, but these are the highlights. As she was finishing up my hair she asked if she could pray. The moment this woman began to pray, heaven came down. She prayed for healing over me, my husband, and my children. She went to bat against the powers of darkness, prayed over my house and so much more! God moved! By the time my hair was braided God had answered Luke’s and my prayers. I can’t say that everything is perfect, but the release has happened, the bonds have been broken and I can see the changes beginning, even if it’s just small changes. 

Come to find out, she had been trying to give that 7am appointment to people all week and no one would take it. Thursday morning she told the Lord that either He was saving that appointment for someone specific or she was going to get to sleep in Friday morning. When I called, she wasn’t sure if she was going to offer me that appointment and almost didn’t call me back. She didn’t take my number when I called, (which I thought odd) and she told me that she couldn’t remember the name that came up on her caller ID, so she asked the Lord to either remind her so she could find my number, or that I’d call back if I was meant to take that appointment. She found my number, called me back and I accepted the appointment. Luke and I were talking about how God was working days before to make this happen. It’s a bit WOWing! 

This went so much longer than I thought it would, but I hope that this story is an encouragement to you no matter what you’re currently facing or have faced in your life. Know that the Father only gives good gifts and that it is His greatest desire to do so! 

-Sarah